Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in corbin_bernsen's LiveJournal:

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Sunday, November 5th, 2006
6:57 pm	November Strain When I last journalled it was July and it was hot. Now it's November and it's cold. Such is the way of the seasons. Well It's been an experience rich last few months. Skipping to the end I'm now working at the British Council in an open-ended temp position. It's good in the sense that I left Xerox to stop giving head to the "man" and work for an organisation that's nominally worthwhile. However I'm but a lowly temp now so how long they will require me, not to mention how long I want to work in the role I'm in are uncertain things. I'm just going from week to week- which on one hand makes me a devil may care free spirit, but I'm missing the status and stability of being a full-time employee. One thing's for sure my flight from Xerox to alternative employment has been and will be quite a journey. Still banging away on the guitar and believe me I will strumm to the bitter tuneless end. One of my main obstacles is the singing/playing combo- I just can't do the rubbing tummy and patting head like thing of singing one set of notes while strumming a steady beat on the guitar. Am also concerned that I've started on the b*stard hard acoustic guitart when I could be making much more progress on the baby soft strings of an electric guitar. Such is my bed though... Anyway next stage of project Corbin Plays Guitar is get someone to pay up front for a few guitar lessons for a xmas present- I've made an acquaintance with the basics and now I'm looking for some bearded guitar guru to give my quest direction. In other news I'm getting right into Phil Dick at the moment and am questioning the very nature of reality. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, July 3rd, 2006
9:55 pm	And something else... but nothing inparticular Well it's been two months since I left work and it's starting to grate a bit. I've still got money in the bank, the sun's out and I'm living a mild hedonistic lifestyle- two games of cricket a week, punctuated by sleep, world cup football, playstation, the odd night of boozing and a wedding on the Isle of Mann. Not really looking for sympathy here- it's not a bad time. I really wish though I was spending this break from the rat race more constructively i.e writing stuff, really throwing myself into the guitar and doing some serious thinking about what I want to do career wise. I'm just not blessed with manic constructive energy. Having said all that, I have applied for all of one jobs- and a very interesting on at that- a junior curator's role at the National Army Museum- with a lot of cajoling from R. Only did that last week, so fingers crossed. Really should be writing mini-essays on the battle of the Somme and posting those if I was truly suitable for the job. Very good indeed btw Phil. I am reading Ernst Junge's Storm of Steel right now which is apparently the 'best first hand account of world war one' (does using the word 'sullen' by a BB contestent make that person by definition intelligent? R tends to think so). To be honest all this being fascinated by war is a bit of a guilty pleasure- although one that far too many men share- and one that makes me feel a bit grubby (have just found out I can't lick my elbows). I really long to be about a thousand times more bohemian- whatever that means. Apart from that job, job searching has is always something I'm putting off until tomorrow. I'm assuming, perhaps wrongly, there'll always be some temp work going when I can't put things off any longer. Really got to get more applications out there- I'll recommence with a vengeance tomorrow, or the day after, or after this heatwave comes to an end etc. etc. Haven't told my parents yet about my voluntary unemployment- this is a mistake. Have been having faintly surreal conversations with mum about how things are going at Xerox. It's getting awkward to say the least. I'm all grown up now and in the words of Billy Joel 'it's my life' and I'm pathetic. Guitaring is still very much ongoing. I practice alamost every day and am still trudging in the right direction. Just getting to grips with F- haven't realised a small flap of my skin was deadening the bottom string- hence making it impossible. I'm slow. Looking for a book with some good songs to practice my chords with. It's very elusive- either they're too advanced, or lacking in musical notation. Kumbaya, swing low sweet chariot, auld langsyne, Michael row the boat ashore etc. are getting very wearing. (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 16th, 2006
12:16 pm	Still here- G+ coming up for five months Life's been eventful enough- Left work two weeks ago and have found out not working is not all it's cracked up to be. At least with a job to tire you out each day, you've got an excuse to put doing everything of and not do anything constructive with your life. Now I can do anything and everything- which is quite intimidating and has actually left me in a state of inertia. All I've got to show for my newly liberated weekdays is paying the council tax and putting together an Ikea storage thingy. Things I've go to do: Sort out online banking Clean flat Get fit and healthy RELAX Get job (not until June) The guitaring continues. I'm still practicing hard and adding new things to my repertoire. The 'fourth' position and double stops are my current projects. Ape rock musical is stuttering at the moment- have fine tuned my two existing songs and am mulling over the next one. It's either going to be 'Why does this man hate monkeys?'- this'll be about the leader of the anti-simean movement, a nutter who feels threatened by potential monkey evolution and had his nose bitten off as a child by a golden lion tamarin...or something. The other is about monkeys from space. The idea is that spider monkey's sent into space in the early days of the space race actually survived, ended up on an alien planet, evolved into super spider monkeys and now threaten the entire human race. Looking back at the last entry- actually had a good time in Paris- if I sounded bitter, my corrupted bowels were to blame. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, April 6th, 2006
6:14 pm	Solid food used to be a friend of mine Ok back from Paris and the French made me ill. I've got the charming combination of something flu-like and diarrohea and I hold the French totally responsible. I'm sure a Frenchman coughed on me. Went to Paris for the first time on Saturday and here's how it went... Day 1- Eurostar was underwhelming. Just a long tunnel really. Our hotel was in the Marais district (quite literally gay Paris). The Marais district on a Saturday night is really 'in your face'. Veritable armies of gay men- lined up outside cafes (Fench cafe seats are often lined up like a row of seats in a cinema, with everyone sat back watching the world go by). I'm moderately right on though and took it all in my stride only occasionally saying things like 'look those two men are holding hands' and 'there's not nearly enough lesbians round here'. The gay idyll was slightly undermined by the sight of a creepy middle aged man 'negotiating a fee' with a dangerously young rentboy. If anyone should be going on strike in France it's that poor rentboy. Day 2- Les invalides- great big chunks of it were closed. Apart from a powerful holocaust exhibition and the collection of scaled maps- underwhelming. Needs a lot of rennovation, much like French employment law. Napoleon's tomb looked like a piece of furniture. Walked up to the Eiffel tower as you do. In hindsight it was just as well me and R didn't attempt to scale it given our collective lack of head for heights. It's umm...big and metallic. Day 3- The Pere La Chaise cemetery. I don't go to nearly enough cemeteries. The whole walking among a city of the dead thing is a sobering and almost oppressive experience. As I took a, probably inappropriate, photo I swear I felt a 'prescence'. What it's most famous for is Jim Morrison's grave and me, like the airheaded tourist I was, thought that was the best reason for going there. In fact Jim Morrison's grave is blight on that cemetery. The amount of 'messages to Jim' written on other people's tombsones is offensive. Whatever you think of the mainly famous and wealthy buried there, writing on other people's tombstones is just crass. Whether Jim Morrison deserves even half this adulation is another question. Much better is Oscar Wilde's grave- adorned with kisses by his admirers and as far as I could see without any 'Oscar fallout' on other graves. We then went to Notre Dame, only said 'you've seen one gothic cathedral you've seen them all' once. Magnificent but the feeling of awe and solemnity it should engender is mitigated by the hoards of school tripping adolescents photographing everything and probably taking in very little. Day 4 - En Greve! Not that we knew it at the time but lots of French teachers/students/general workers were on strike and protesting against what is by our great country's standards anyway, moderate labour reform. What they're protesting against is 2 year contracts being brought in for first jobbers that can be cancelled by the employer at anytime. Considering the levels of youth unemployment in France, you'd think an insecure job and the chance to get some work experience is better than no job at all. They seem to have very high expectations of the employment rights that come with any job. Given that France is a country where there is a maximum 35 hour working week, it's very easy to be sceptical. Most of the major attractions were closed but the unions didn't get to the Menagerie. We had our best red panda experience ever- accompanied by chanting and police sirens from the nearby riot/demonstration. Toddled up to the Musee D'Orsee (en greve!), the Louvre (ferme for unspecified reasons and in some ways like modern French employment law in being an overblown extravagance) and Le Centre Pompidou (ugly building). Then got ill and have been getting down with the porcelain ever since. Guitaring is still continuing- will journalise seperately. (Comment on this)
Saturday, March 4th, 2006
6:12 pm	G+ I've given up counting the days and Mick Hucknall an appreciation. I wish I could dazzle you with tales of the blooming talent of this particular guitar prodigy but it's been slow progress of late. It's practicing the same old things and progress, if it's being made, is hard to identify. My main focus is just chords and strumming at the moment- being able to bang out clean chords is the bricks and mortar of guitaring really. What's bothering me is chord changing- everywhere I've heard acoustic guitarage, the artist changes effortlessly- not only at great speed without missing a beat but maintaining a clean sound as well. I'm finding that the sound of previous chord fading out is interfering with next chord- without putting you hand on the strings to stop the chord dead, I can't figure out the clean chord change. Any advice from my half-a dozen LJ buddies would be much appreciated. Am enjoying my songwriting though. Have now got two identifiable songs for my simian acoustic guitar rock opera. This is 'Apes in Danger' - now in full. Apes in Dang-er E Em Chimps in Per-il E EM Baboons in Des-pair E EM (strings played individually on last note. They used to be our friends Sort of like you an me Marmosets with their tiny faces Gibbons in the trees Then things changed This is all single string stuff on the first and second frets. And now it's... Repeat Chorus Chain-smoking chimps Orangutans with limps Gorilla's dressed up in lace Spider Monkey's sent into space (same music as first verse) Everywhere it's... Repeat chorus. Does anyone care? AM The second song is Sinister Ape/Kill the Chimp Sinister Ape AM There in his cage E Sinister Ape AM Filled with rage EM Sinister Ape AM Starting to see red. EM Sinister Ape AM Wants - us - dead EM- go a bit mental here, strum like a powerful horse. We've Got To. 4th fret top string, 3rd fret top string, 2nd fret top string. Kill the chimp F single note, double note Hang the chimp D single note, double note Repeat three times- slower and more dramatic the third the time. And on to Mick Hucknall- found myself watching 'Classic Albums' late last night which featured renowned classic album Stars by Simply Red. Watched it in anticipation of being able to point and laugh at the Simply Redsters try and put artistic meaning into their non-descript middle of the road ginger pop. I still don't much like them or anything but take away the cusp of the nineties overproduction, w*nky bass, sax and electric keyboard and underneath it all, Mick Hucknall put together some very good melodies whith strong lyrical content on the album. That is all. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, February 13th, 2006
10:33 pm	G+ 50 50 days since cosmic guitar light came into my life. At least I think it's 50 days. Things going relatively well. Two major advances have been made. Firstly I'm now approaching semi-competence when it comes to switching between the D & A chords which is a big thing. Secondly I've learnt that the best way to play chords is not to strum them two hard, your pick really needs just to be kissing the strings, not out and out striking them. Wish my book had told me that, would have spared people a bit of earache. Can also now bang out Swanee River which uses the 'second position' and bit more fingeral dexterity than I've been using so far. Get me. My next mini-guitar project is the switch between D & F. Already making some good headway here. My major worry at the moment is my lack of 'musicality' in so much as my lack of timing and rythym and basically making a chord driven song sound like it should. Learning how to play chords, switch between them and play single string melodies is all solid technical ability at the end of the day and practice will out. Sensing the 'music' seems something quite apart right now. R says it will come in time. Still working on my Simian acoustic guitar rock opera. Haven't got anything that's yet ready for publication yet unfortunately. Ended my last entry on the cliffhanger 'oh and I've handed my notice in' - and indeed I have. I will be gone by the end of March and from then on my future will be exhilaratingly-ish uncertain. Mum won't like it. (Comment on this)
Monday, February 6th, 2006
1:36 pm	G+40-ish(?) days Even though work is resembling a fairly hectic episode of MASH today- I'm still finding time to wax lyrical at length about the life of Corbin. First off- Guitar. Feeling more positive lately. Nothing new to speak of in adding to my repertoire- my guitar 'sessions' just involve practicing the same old tunes/chords again and again at the moment until the 'skills' have been developed. Chords still ropey as a public hanging- but getting less so. Can play melodies though without even looking at the my 'axe' which is good. Quite irked about the pub quiz on thursday night. We finished fifth-ish. This was largely due to a poorly conceived Beatles no.1 round where you got 2 points deducted for a wrong answer and 1 point for a right answer. We got 7/10 which equated to 1 point overall. If we had got eight out of ten we would have got four points (9/10 would have been seven points!). Considering four points seperated the top five this seemed to favour those with an encyclopedic knowledge of the Beatles just a little too much. Having said that we're not even sure Dungeon master provided the right answers as these didn't match the no.1's on Matt's Beatles no.1's album. Our policeman friend Stuey was a little too vocal in questioning Dungeon master's answers though (he'd already put him right over Martina Hingis's comback) and I get the impression Dungeon master thought we had cheated by using Matt's Ipod. I fear we may have got on the wrong side of Dungeon master. All in all a 'ruddy shambles'. Other things- 'Greatest show in earth' -'you've got sawdust in you veins' and dogs riding dogs, riding horses. Tenko- should Burt Kwok be convicted of war crimes? Me and R tend to think yes he should be. Oh and I've handed my notice in... (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, January 29th, 2006
2:59 pm	G+34-ish days I'm a little downbeat about my guitaring today. I'm still making progress I guess. My 'Little Brown Jug' is as good-ish as my 'On top of Old Smokey' and 'Old Mcdonald' now. To add to my repertoire of cutting edge modern music I'm now starting on 'Swanee River'. It's all about the chords though and kum by f*cking ya. I'm slowly improving on my chord changes but being able to bang out a whole chord based tune is still a distant horizon. On a brighter note I'm progressing with my simian based acoustic guitar rock opera. You've seen the main chorus- which still remains, although the 'Baboons in Despair' line ends em/am now instead of just em. Working on the verse now- This currently goes- They used to be our friends. Just like you and me. Marmosets with their tiny faces. Gibbons in the trees Can't write the music- it's just a bit of fiddling about on the first fret though. Then things changed. Second fret 3rd string open, second string second fret, first (bottom) string open. Then bangs into: Kill the chimps! (G) Hang the chimps! (D) And back to the chorus. Although this last bit might turn out be a different number. For the record there used to be 25 million chimpanzees in the wild, now there are only 140,000. Current Music: Timelock on More-4 (Comment on this)
Monday, January 16th, 2006
1:15 pm	G+23 days Well I still feel like I'm making process. I've added a pretty ropey 'Little Brown Jug' to my repertoire (she had gin, I had rum, I tell you what we'd lot's of fun. No really we did.). It's all still very daunting. My fingers feel clumbsy, my chord changes need to be ten times quicker and I've got get a bit more musical in terms of picking up rhythm and stuff. Skin is peeling off the tips of my caloused fingertips now which is nice. It's going to take a whole lot of time and hard work- I think that's goood though because life is all about the journey not the destination apparently. In other news I'm 28 tomorrow. I'm so all grown up now it hurts. Took the mutt to my childhood home off the Edgeware road yesterday to have a 'moment' of contemplation. Didn't really work. Could barely recognise my old house, it was a painfully grey and gloomy sunday afternoon, Magnus tried to attack a jogger and a random mad lady called me a 'f*cking b*stard of a man'. Then went home and got fat on a Domino's pizza. Happy days. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, January 11th, 2006
10:47 am	G+17 days Back to the guitaring. Haven't made too much progress of late, partly due to not having much time to dedicate to guitaring and partly due to the next metaphorical plateau(copyright Phil) being a long, steep, dangerous climb. On the positive side I can now play Old Mcdonald had a farm in it's entirety. Also my fingertips are well on the way to becoming calloused- picking one's nose is now an interesting sensation. It's still all about the chords and switching between the buggers. The accomplished guitar player should be able to switch between these lovelies without missing a beat. This is easy if you're moving one finger (switching from E to EM) but exceptionally difficult with most other chords which involve moving all your fingers. I guess it's all about the three P's: practice, perseverance & Patrick Moore. My lack of guitaring prowess hasn't stopped me going down the road of composing though. The oeuvre I'm currently work on is a rock opera about the plight of simians- possibly to be composed entirely in the chords of E & EM. This is the main chorus (with chords indicated if you want to play at home): Apes in Danger E EM Chimps in Peril E EM Baboons in Despair E EM To be very much continued. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, January 5th, 2006
9:55 am	Dream number nine Sorry no guitar news today, just a dream I have to make a note of. I dreamt I had a new job. I was part of project team for another company preparing an application to be launched to it's workforce. I was there on a trial basis- but was so much better than everyone else and everything was going swimmingly. I liked the people I worked with, I felt positive, I felt warm, I felt fuzzy. It was beautiful, just beautiful. The mechanics of the job actually involved making words out of lego bricks falling from the sky, whilst fending off a giant robot. The robot was actually friendly but was really pestering us. Eventually I warded it off by means of a rocket launcher and as far as I can remember the promise of a 'Chas 'n Dave night'. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, January 3rd, 2006
7:26 pm	I've got my guitar and I'm going to learn how to make it talk. From now on it's all about the guitar- anything that was vaguely interesting other about parts of my life have now been sacrificed at the altar at the strings of steel. This blog is now all about one tragic, musically handicapped man trying get to grips with the acoustic guitar and all the mayhem and hilarity which ensues*. Please feel free to delete me from your friend's list if you haven't already. So I am now G+9 days into my odyssey. Progress, albeit slow and painful, is being made. My 'portfolio' now includes: On top of my old Smokey (all of it!) The opening of old Mcdonald had a farm. Small intro bit from Nirvanna's version of the man who sold the world. First chord of Romeo and Juliette by Dire Strates- it's a particularly nice chord. Small intro bit from Everybody Hurts by REM. Can only play this in D, I'm sure Phil was playing this chordless the other night- not sure how he did it. Phil's somewhat nifty with the guitar it has to be said. Chords A,AM,E,EM,D,F & C. Currently working on the chords, making them sound right and the hardest thing- switching between them- all whilst butchering my fingertips (typing this has been quite painful). *Substitute mayhem with tedium and hilarity with mild annoyance as applicable. Current Mood: ditzy (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 28th, 2005
12:25 am	Corbin played guitar... ...jamming good with... just a couple of amazingly tolerant family pets so far. The news has been that I'm going through an early mid-life crisis and for Christmas this was capped off with... an acoustic guitar. My musical 'career' to date involves just some average percussion in prep school- so it's a real new adventure I'm undertaking here. After getting on for three days of my adventures in guitar land I've learnt a few things. If I knew how to type something and then cross it out to show what I'm really thinking but won't publicly admit to I'd probably say something like 'guitar is for strangeley fingered extra-terrestrials with four separate brains '. The first thing is that it HURTS. To get a chord right you need to press firmly down on two or three steel strings at a time against the wooden long bit (it has a name)which is very tough on the finger tips. In fact you need to develop calouses on them and toughen them up if you're going to progress. At the moment I've got two nice blisters going so progress in some sense is being made. There are CHORDS (Light reading of the first 2 chapters of 'Guitar for Dummies' doesn't actually make me an authority on guitar so my word is not gospel) which have exciting names like A, D, G, E and (my personal favourite so far) E minor. By putting your fingers on the appropriate frets and strumming 4-6 strings at once you can make the guitar strike big rounded notes. Play these in bars of 4/4 time (I'm blagging this) and you can be banging out Kumbaya and Swing low Sweet chariot in no time. The tough bit is switching these chords- I'm currently fighting the battle of A to D. At the moment my Kumbaya doesn't get past 'kumbaya my lord...' and my swing low sweet chariot doesn't get past 'swing low...'. My fingertips aren't scarred enough and my fingers not yet dextrous enough to make much progress on the chord front. You can also play individual notes which involve striking individual strings- having more luck here as you don't need to fret more than one string if at all at a time. I can do a recogniseable 'old macdonald had a farm' (not the whole song just 'the old mcdonald had a farm and on that farm he had' bit). I'm currently working on 'On top of old smokey'. Boy is R in for a treat. I'm getting bored now- but the main things IT'S REALLY BLOODY HARD. This a a big f*ck off mentaphorical (I've mis-spelt this, but I think it's a better word) mountain I'm climbing. It's one I must climb though. I'm utterly convinced that the ability to appear that you can play the guitar is the key to all happiness. I must stay strong. I must stay determined. I will fight them on the beaches, I will fight them in designated picnic areas, I will never surrender. NEVER! If I don't make it with the guitar then It's Gentle Ben IV: Valley of the Pornweasels. (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, December 20th, 2005
1:36 pm	Mysterious Roland One day I want to be naked a top a mountain. Current Mood: tired (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, December 16th, 2005
2:06 pm	Fleas the size of rats sucked on rats the size of cats Main reason I'm posting is to show off my new picture of steaming bathing monkeys. In other news won pub quiz last night and got a 10% pay rise and yet still my life feels incomplete... (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, December 13th, 2005
9:31 pm	I got confused, I killed a horse When I started live-journaling I thought I'd be able to fill it with exciting news from the world according to Corbin twice a day. Unfortunately the world according to Corbin is a dull, prosaic old place most of the time. The past week has just been christmas shopping, work as usual, watching the same old programmes on telly and not much else. Not that I'm unhappy with the status quo, it's just not quite diary of Anne Franks material. Still the stand out bits of the last week were discovering a friend had genuinely believed he was Jesus. Obviously it was part of a very distressing episode but what a staggering 'experience' it must have been. In other news purchased David Bowie's Diamond Dogs- has over the top prog rock spoken intro- which if you're of the Bowie tendency is worth checking out. Continued the bizarre conflict that is festive present buying for my brother. To sum up he mostly buys me thoughtless shite every year, in 'retaliation' I try and confuse him. Past presents to him have included Uncle Bulgaria, Orinoco, dancing/singer hamsters (I genuinely found them amusing once), lollies with insects in them and this year a bongo drum. I'm getting a guitar from my parents and I'm fearful of a brotherly bongo drum/acoustic guitar folk combo. Only present I haven't 'nailed' is something for my dad. He's very academic and bookish and all that. He has too many books, normally buy him booze, really should buy something different. Haven't a clue. Any suggestion would be welcome- he's emphatically not everyday bloke material-maybe a cheese selection pack? Hmmmm... (Comment on this)
Thursday, December 8th, 2005
2:26 pm	I'm quite embarassed to be doing this... ...because I'm so much cooler than everyone else? I class this as officially dismal but here I go anyway... 1: What is one thing you did in 2005 that you'd never done before? Been quite a few things I haven't done for while- first time for anything- probably just eating an oyster which wasn't the most memorable experience. That and heroin. 2: Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Think I had three - travel, get fit and find new job. Only managed one out of three. 3: Did someone close to you give birth? R's sister. A lovely weird little thing she's given birth to as well. 4: Did anyone close to you die? No. 5: What countries did you visit? Austria. 6: What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005? New job. General contentment. Lando Clarissean in Jabba's Palace disguise doll. 7: What dates from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? 7th July- not directly affected except for a long, long walk home. But certainly something that has etched itself on the psyche of every commuting londoner. Not good with dates generally- they really have to be a 07/07 or 09/11 for me to really remember them. 8: What was your biggest achievement of the year? My wicketkeeping and pub quizzing. 9: What was your biggest failure? My bowling and my job. 10: Did you suffer illness or injury? Not really. 11: What was the best thing you bought? A loaf of bread called Bernd. 12: Whose behaviour merited celebration? Her indoors. 13: Whose behaviour made you appalled? Too many to list- especially politicians, journalists, Australian cricketers and in all probably getting on for 2/3 of the world's population. 14: Where did most of your money go? Tax and savings. Dullard. 15: What did you get really, really, really excited about? Tragically Star Wars episode III. 16: What song will always remind you of 2005? Every Rose has it's Thorn -Poison. 17: Compared to this time last year, are you: i. happier or hardened? Bit of both. ii. thinner or fatter? Probably the same. iii. richer or poorer? Richer in a material sense. 18: What do you wish you'd done more of? Appreciating the simple things in life. 19: What do you wish you'd done less of? Being stuck in front of computer/tv screens. 20: How will you be spending Christmas? With the family, same as the past 26 years of my life. 21: Did you fall in love in 2005? Did that in 2002 (?), still there. 22: Any one-night stands? 38 23: What was your favourite TV program? Might Boosh, a couple of episodes of little appreciated Swiss Toni were sublime, watching Lost avidly - not sure if I'm better off for doing so and maybe some stuff at the beginning of the year I've totally forgotten about. 24: Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? Hate's a very strong word. I think you need to really know someone to hate them, or maybe that's just semantics. I'm sure hate's a very bad emotion that's best not pay too much attention to. 25: What was the best book you read? Not 100% sure if it was this year I read it -but Wild Swans by whatserface is getting on for the best book I've ever read. It is a rich, epic tale of humanity that made 600 odd pages just fly by. 26: What was your greatest musical discovery? Soundtrack to Steve Sizou and the Life Aquatic. Sue Jorge's acoustic portugese versions of Bowie songs are brill. 27: What did you want and get? Humiliation of the Australian cricket team. 28: What did you want and not get? Lando Calrissean in Jabba's Palace disguise doll. 29: Favorite film of this year? Having trouble remembering what films came out this year- Kiss, Kiss, Bang, Bang was good- Metallica Some kind of Monster was last year wasn't it? Oooh Life Aquatic was good. Sideways- that was another good one- that was really good actually. 30: What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? Went to Lake District with R and I was 27. 31: What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? A blubbing Ricky Ponting resigning as Australia's captain. 32: How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005? Corporate whore. 33: What kept you sane? R & drugs. 34: Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? David Cameron. 35: Who do you miss? Magnus, Lizzie and Fred. 36: Who was the best new person you met? Still 'hanging' out with the same old people. 37: Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005: Life is futile. Current Mood: predatory (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, December 4th, 2005
9:10 pm	Tom's abreviated world of sport and pub quizzes Tried writing a longwinded entry earlier today, just for it to delete itself so to sum it up- Peter Crouch- Goal!!!! Shaun Udal- burning in a giant wicker effigy of Derek Underwood One man short- and still far too good for us. Bitter defeat in the pub quiz. Slash- action figure! Christmas shopping- a circle of hell. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 30th, 2005
10:28 pm	Day 3- Not getting a taste for this or anything. Today I've been mostly marvelling at the song Pearly Dewdrop's Drops by the Cocteau twins. This song achieves the rare double of having lyrics that are near impossible to make out when listening to and sublimely puzzling when you read them. It's also just a 'fab' tune. This is this work of 'alternative eighties' poetry: We'll be sold to Roddy Comes for pearly dewdrop's drops Weeks in our company Buys the pearly dewdrop's drops We'll be soaked and ruddy Comes for pearly dewdrop's drops Weeks in our company Buys the pearly dewdrop's drops We'll be soaked when Roddy comes Rows of pearly dewdrop's drops Tis the lucky lucky penny penny penny Buys the pearly dew drips soaks We'll be soaked when around he comes Rows of pearly dewdrop's drops Tis the lucky lucky penny penny penny Buys the pearly dew drips soaks Taciturn to fellow So try to turn to loan him these Bruised your eye on her staff So when he turned around he saw Taciturn to fellow So try to turn to loan him these Bruised your eye on her staff So if we send the Roddy, soaks We'll be soaked when Roddy comes Rows of pearly dewdrop's drops Tis the lucky lucky penny penny penny Buys the pearly dew drips soaks (We'll be sold to Roddy, sold to Roddy) Rows of pearly dewdrop's drops (We'll be sold to Roddy, sold to Roddy) Tis the lucky lucky penny penny penny Buys the pearly dew drips soaks When listening to this, it sounds like a foreign language with the singer's odd pronounciation (soaked is surked for instance)and beautiful mumbling. But what do the lyrics mean? Who's Roddy? What are pearly dewdrop's drops? Bruised your eye on her staff? My research, such has it's been, hasn't dug anything up- I kind of get the impression the lyrics shouldn't have any tangible meaning. It's got me thinking of the late Roddy Mcdowell (dressed as monkey) communing with exquisitely beautiful sentient rain drop prostitutes. Regardless I want to be soaked and ruddy. But I feel I'm only scratching the surface of the possible genius of the Cocteau twins. Here's a list of quirky songs they've done: Shallow Then Halo When Mama Was Moth Five Ten Fiftyfold Sugar Hiccup Glass Candle Grenades Musette and Drums Millimillenary Pearly Dewdrops' Drops Fluffy Tufts Oomingmak [Actually, this is the Inuit word for musk ox—it means 'the bearded one'] Blue Bell Knoll The Itchy Glowbo Blow Spooning Good Singing Gum A Kissed Out Red Floatboat [he Ella Megalast Burls Forever Pitch The Baby Iceblink Luck Fifty-fifty Clown Wolf in the Breast Frou-frou foxes in midsummer fires High Monkey Monk Sigh's Smell of Farewell Orange Appled Squeeze-Wax Serpentskirt Calfskin Smack My favourites are Frou-frou foxes in midsummer fires & High Monkey Monk. I feel I need to hitch a ride on the Cocteau twins bus, even if it did leave twenty years ago. In other news I think I'll hand my notice in next month and Peter Crouch still hasn't scored for liverpool. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, November 29th, 2005
10:03 pm	Lusting after ladies I really shouldn't be... Was playing Fahrenheit (an 'innovative' first person adventurish game) on the PS2 last night and had my first experience of computer game porn. The game was proceeding relatively tamely by computer game standards when sexy lady cop Carla Lane suddenly got the freak on with possessed serial killer Lucas Kane. THEY HAD PROPER SEX. They were naked, adopting different positions- ok no genitalia (though you could see Carla's nipples) but it was still bona fide soft core stuff. It left me very confused. If this wasn't enough there's an option in the bonus menu to see 'soul cop' Tyler Brown's hot girlfriend do an erotic for him that involved taking everything off and going 'full frontal'. These pixilated honeys have been preying on my mind all day- in fact I may actually be in love with Carla (the game's quite involving in other ways as well). Good job Rachie won't read this. In other news the England cricket team were continuing to resolutely not take advantage of strong positions on their way to medicore score in the third test and my work life is continuing it's downward spiral into utter life sapping despondency. Work is a prison and the pitiless meat market of the job market is the metaphorical prison wall and guards. Still musn't grumble. Wasn't the film Lawrence of Arabia good? (1 Comment |Comment on this)